


It doesn't matter

by Evylin



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Hammer of gods, and very sad, probably a bit OOC
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-02-28
Updated: 2017-02-28
Packaged: 2018-09-27 12:32:52
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,089
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10020941
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Evylin/pseuds/Evylin
Summary: When Lucifer kills Gabriel, Gabriel bends time to turn the seconds he's got, while his grace burns out, into minutes. A last try to talk to Lucifer.





	

**Author's Note:**

> First of all, this is my first fan fiction in English and it's not beta-read, so well, there could me more than a couple mistakes, though I really tried.  
> Secondly... I'm on season 10 of Supernatural right now and not on season 12, so there might be inaccuracies, because of information, I don't have yet.  
> If either bothers you, then it's probably for the best, if you don't read this.  
> Anyway.. have fun and feel free to leave comments...  
> \- Evylin

The moment Lucifer turned around and grabbed the angel blade, just to thrust it deep into his little brothers grace... that moment when he didn't think, but just kind of 'did' without the smallest hesitation... Lucifer knew he made a mistake. Everything, that was left of his once magnificent grace, cringed with excruciating pain. He saw the light pouring out of Gabriels eyes, his face warped into an expression of surprise and horror.

It was the first time since the beginning of time, that an archangel gave his life and of course it couldn't be a normal death. Every angel in existence and millions of other beings more felt it, when Gabriels grace imploded, but for some it might've been only a little nudge of discomfort in the remotest corners of their mind, but for Lucifer it almost felt like he himself died there. When an archangel dies, they can't hold their being inside that tiny human vessel and they widen over miles. Humans wouldn't even notice, but Lucifer could see his brother dying on every plane of reality and he felt, what it felt like for Gabriel to die.

Time is a strange thing. Hours could pass in just a couple of seconds. Seconds could be minutes. And so Gabriel reached out with the essence of his burning grace and surrounded his brother with everything, that was him.... and Lucifers eyes grew distant and everything disappeared.

________________________________________________________________________________

_"It hurts.", A voice cried out in pain,  
the usual sound of bells and harps disturbed, as the first beginnings of wings sprouted from the angels back.  
"I know. You're almost through it, just a little longer, little brother...",_

Lucifer remembered that time. Confusion drawn on his face he watched the familiar scene before his eyes. It was a long time ago. Millennia before god decided to create earth and humanity. When there were just four angels in existence and the youngest, so afraid of getting his first pair of wings. A deep longing grew in him, as he saw the swirls of his brothers grace. Michael, soft and rigid at the same time... Raphael a sea of calmness surrounding them all... and _Gabriel_ , a golden light, that brightened existence for them so much more.

"I was so scared my wings would be different and you wouldn't love me anymore.",  
Gabriel's voice was tinged with melancholy, as he remembered that one day.  
Lucifer looked up. His brother stood right next to him, maybe a few steps distant, but still in his vessel and the only indication of his angelic being were his the golden eyes.

"You wouldn't believe us, that it didn't matter, what your wings would be like.",he murmured and it felt like somebody else remembered.  
Someone, who craved these old times, where everything was still okay and seemed like it always would be.  
"You wouldn't believe that we'd always love you.",  
Almost, like he was in trance, the words so quiet and small, far, far away. And yet it was his mouth and his voice murmuring them.

Gabriel chuckled without any joy and pulled Lucifer out of his thoughts.  
„What is this here?“, he asked.  
„A memory. A little time bending...“, Gabriel shrugged.  
„Why are you even trying? You‘re burning up. You can‘t uphold _this_..“, Lucifer pointed on their younger versions.  
„I want you to realize that it‘s pointless.“,  
„What?“,  
„This... _fighting.._ “,  
For a moment Lucifer caught a glimpse of burning pain.  
"If Michael hadn't thrown me in the cage,..-",

A twisted grimace showed on Gabriels face. "If Michael hadn't! If Dad hadn't! Is this just a game of finger-pointing?! Does it matter anymore? I don‘t think so... because you know what?", Gabriel took a step forward. "It won't change anything. It can't undo what happened. It won't ever be like this again.", Gabriel turned his head in the direction of his much younger self.

_One pair of ruffled, small wings were now little Gabriel's,_  
_And his brothers were watching over him, spreading their wings,_  
_building a warm cave of feathers, a nest,_  
_while he rested, exhausted from the whole process of his grace expanding._

"This whole fighting-with-Michael-thing? What if you win? What do you think will happen? I'm already pretty much dead. Micheal will be dead. And Raphi? The rest of our brothers? Dad? Do you truly don't care about all of that?", Lucifer didn't move. Regardless his face was a mask of anger. "You of all, are one to speak of caring. You left us. You didn't care then...", His voice was filled with cold disdain, "And now? Now, all you care about, are these _pathetic_ humans and these pagans, _calling themselves gods_!",

"I didn't leave, because I didn't care! I left, because I couldn't stand to watch how everyone I loved broke into pieces. It wasn't my home anymore. It's wasn't heaven itself, that made it my home. It's not the four white towers or the garden. It was you. You four and dad. But you and Michael were fighting **constantly** , and I _tried_ to make it better. I _tried_ , but I accepted, what Raphael couldn't. That, when you got ready for war... there was no _fixing_ things anymore... And I was not about to kill my brothers.",

"Just now you seemed more than ready for that.", Tiredness spread over Gabriel's face. "I'm not stupid, Luci, I know, I'm no match for you. Do you really think, that after all this time I still use the very same tricks in _every_ fight?!",

Realization dawned on Lucifer. "You knew, I would kill you.", he frowned.

"Feeling fit today, don't we?", Gabriel rolled his eyes, his form beginning to flicker. The last remains of his grace burned out...  
"It doesn't matter. Even if I refuse to fight, Michael won't go against fathers orders. There is no choice, brother.",

But Gabriel wasn't there anymore to hear his words..  
________________________________________________________________________________

Lucifer was back in an deserted hotel, his youngest brothers wings burned into the ground at his feet.

And all that was left, was staring at burned feathers, thinking of the day they grew.

_„What do you think of my wings? How do they look?!“, A voice, sounding like bells and harps_  
_„They‘re golden, like your eyes and I think they‘re beautiful.“, Michael with a warm smile._  
_„I love you.“, the youngest angel said, and Raphael spread her wings over the four of them. Gabriel in their middle._  
_„We love you too, Gabriel.“, Warm. Family. Home.._

It‘s hard to believe, but... _ **They had been happy once upon a time.**_


End file.
